Kiss and Tell....

Alright I will KISS !

Nearly all of us do it for pleasure, while the rest few do it on professional demands.

This isn't about the age old folklore of Ugly frog being kissed by a princess....although it would be quite interesting if kissing a frog could solve a major problem for millions of girls.

Dearth of charming young men around ...?!?!?!?!

Normally, most of us are always in a hurry to finish the work we've been assigned ...but this gentleman from Germany seems to be in rush when most of us would like to follow the principle of slow and steady.....Hundred and Eleven kisses in mere sixty seconds...!!!!!!

This news is sure to turn many of you green with envy...after all who wouldn't want to kiss 111 women and get applauded and honored for it as well (for those of you raising eyebrows out there, this sentence was applicable only for female lovers)....couldn't have asked for more keeping your sanity around!!!

A lot of thinking and planning must have gone behind this...arranging for 111 women on a Friday night and convincing them for a quick peck is undeniably commendable. Maybe those of you who are still single and ready to mingle could take a leaf from this German Lad's kissing tales...

One person to jump in joy over this news would be Emraan Hashmi....our Indian Serial Kisser...Albeit not in 60 seconds, but Mr. Hashmi too might have breached the 111 mark by now...after all, he hasn't earned the title of Serial Kisser for nothing...Well, do not worry Mr. Hashmi. This German man has done it only once...for you there is no stopping…no competition...you can gladly sit on your kissing throne and keep raising the bar for the young generations and inspire the oldies for something better....I hear many chuckles around... ;)

Thanks to the numerous self proclaimed moral policing groups thriving well in our country, while it is virtually impossible for someone to muster courage of this level and create a world record in such acts in India, we surely can enjoy such records created else where....

All said and done, this record must definitely have been a treat for Michael Basting….statistically he kissed 2 women in one second…pheww!! That must have been lightning fast. Now that’s why people say “happiness lies in small things in life”.

With 111 kisses, Michael Basting has perfectly adhered to the principles of KISS...Keep It Short and Simple (What did u think when I said I will KISS ???...naughty naughty !!) … maybe Michael could try creating another record and rejuvenate some more principles for us!

Now stop being impish and learn to KISS…

They came, they saw and they CONQUERED

The perfect week saw a perfect ending...
The entire nation went swinging through the hysteric phase of poll results and the IPL finals. But when the verdict was out some sobbed, some laughed and some watched it stealthily.

From the magnanimous rise of the underdogs to the incessant steering towards stability, we saw it all!
Amidst rattling speculations and media hype our nation reposed its love and faith in the Manmohanomics government, while on the other hand the IPL cup was bravely won by the Deccan Chargers of Hyderabad with a perfect nail biting finish...Voila...as they say in french!

So, while I go and have a perfect good night sleep, hope the ever enthusiastic fans of RCB would cheer up with the fact that their pet team is at No. 2 position, way above the rung earned by them in IPL season 1...afterall isn't effort more important than the result?

Battle Against Accelerating Loyalty....

A country which has moved from bullock carts to satellites and rockets, snail trailed from silent movies to sci-fi blockbusters, metamorphosed from labor-intensive nation to computerized nation, given the world some of the most brilliant brains in the literary world, technology world, business world et al. still abodes people who think computerization is the route which is leading us into an abysmal pitch of problems!

It was much appalling to read the recent statement made by Samajwadi Party chief Mulayam Singh Yadav "Let us put an end to any further computerization in this country".

Does he think that India has reached the acme of development and now is the time to turn the wheel of progress the other way round? Just the time when we are gaining foothold on the global scene, Mr. Minister wants to drag us down. Why not? After all who would be benefited the most when the citizens remain uneducated and unequipped for handling the massive work for the mammoth size population of our country! No prizes for guessing the answer.

Most of us would agree that the country in question has moved up the ladder of development and progressive phase. Sadly not all think so!

Mulayam Singh with his not so mulayam statements seems to be suffering with amnesia and ignorance, both at the same time!
Does he not know that this country, with hundreds of years of slavery and backwardness has been able to jostle ahead chiefly riding on the success waves of computerization?
Unemployment is an issue which has been the cause of concern for this nation for decades, but it would be utterly moronic to state that computerization has been the cause behind it. How about the ever growing population of this country? Did it ever occur to Mr. Singh that the monstrous population of this country could be a contributing factor in increasing the unemployment crisis? I guess not.

Just to remind Mr. Singh that he belongs to a state which stands the tallest in our country for its population…what an irony! Or maybe he is a staunch believer of a famous rural saying “as many people, so many hands to earn”. Alas! Mulayam Singh is unable to look at the number of mouths which need to be fed as well.

Maybe such piece of information only bites dust at his door step and never reaches his politicized ears.

Statements and views like this are quite alarming especially if they come from the top brass of a country like politicians and they do nothing but impel me to wonder about the orthodox and constricted vision being nurtured. Vocalizing such petty thoughts would do no good but expose the hollowness of the pillar on which our country has been creeping towards growth!

A sigh of relief prevails to see that the immoderate groups did not make a hill out of this mole, this time. On a lighter note while our minister is quite anti about the computerization, his own party has floated its website flaunting details about his family and the party! Mr. Mulayam Singhji shouldn’t you be not using the computer for your campaigning based on your own statement? Or is your statement applicable only for the aam junta? Hail the rules of game...the game named politics.

While an answer to this question would be another twisted tale of stagnant thoughts and conceited behaviour, for me this whole situation is nothing more than a farcical moment of the Indian politics.

The Young .....and the Restless

"Juvenile crime" is the most raging word of the year so far, with news pouring from across the country about young minds behind some ghastly deeds. It is not for the first time that such heart rendering news are gracing the media reports, but yes, the frequency of such incidents is enough to raise an alarm towards the emerging paradigm in the crime world, which might flourish into a nightmarish trend, sooner or later!

Such news makes me wonder if India’s doing a US.

What prompts these children to take such extreme steps? Is too much exposure to violence instilling a desire to act in this manner, or inability of their kith and kin to share and understand their problems pushing them to indulge in such gory acts? Or could there be a third angle to it.

Causes could be numerous, but the effect is only one. Crime in various forms like death, burglary and rape to name a few.

Though these are case specific incidents, they force me to wonder if we are witnessing a trend catching up in India. Tolerance level has indisputably plummeted not only in the 25+ category, but also amongst children (both kids and teenagers).Blame it to the high pressurizing schedule at work and school or the over exposure to the violence through all forms of media. The impact is slowly percolating deep down and becoming visible with each generation passing by. And, if we delve a little deeper, the fault is not entirely of media or work culture. Parents also need to develop an understanding of their child’s environment. Not every issue can be settled by children themselves. Parental intervention becomes necessary, especially when there is violence and vulgarity involved. The majority of onus lies on schools and parents in mentoring children. Such incidents are perturbing especially, when we speak of Indian youth creating global stir for their talent on one hand and teenagers killing people on the other. A clear dichotomy gets reflected here. A dichotomy which might not get well digested in some time, if proper check at the right time is not taken.

Another poignant aspect to juvenile crime is when it gets performed on another juvenile mind!It’s a double edged sword where two minds and souls are slaughtered at the same time.

Are we heading towards a progressive or a regressive society?

It baffles me to even think of what goes in the mind of a child while committing felony of the highest orders. It indeed runs a chill down my spine merely trying to put myself their shoes. I dare not, I can not! All that’s left in my heart and mind right now is the remnant of the sweetness and the innocence that is associated with the word “childhood”. Such grisly events might soon reduce these remnants into memories of yesterdays.

Sweeping such incidents under the carpet and ignoring this pattern would only increase the complexity of resolving it. It’s better to wake up now and see around your child, before the bliss of your ignorance towards her/him ruins the beautiful future you have concocted for your child.

Are we willing to let that happen? Maybe, we all need to think about it.

Potpourri...of Rain, IPL and Politics

And the driving season embarks with full ardor…..while the little showers of rain in Bangalore makes the drive even more pleasant, the entire nation is getting driven by IPL and Political commotion….yes all over again !!!

It creates a sense of déjà vu, when you read and hear about the hoopla created around the IPL matches. The recent decision to host the IPL matches in England/South Africa has driven the entire country into frenzy of disappointments. The Indian fans back home would definitely miss the cloak of heat and the excitement which this season is known to drape the entire nation in…not to forget the big bucks pocketed by franchisee and sponsors. All the big drama with tears and emotions would take a miss to a larger extend, this time. Right from the cricket icons to the layman, everybody has expressed the burning desire to let India host this mega event…after all it’s an Indian Premier League or do I hear Inthe Political Loggerhead….

Any issue which could churn the sentiments of public at large becomes the cynosure of Indian political arena and what better than cricket, which is most widely accepted religion in our country! Nothing else binds us Indians together, as much as cricket , which gets the unanimous vote of people across the length and breadth of the country…and our political big-wigs know how best to milk the situation. It’s become a tug-of-war between the Hierarchical Legacy party and the Sycophant Hindutva belching party. This issue is also spinning huge money for media which is busy airing the so called big-debates involving the who’s who of the two parties and mustering all the TRP ratings. So who is complaining? Everyone seems to be basking in the glory (read hue and cry) of IPL hosting. The only sect which remains non-benefited is the common man who can just follow the policy of wait and watch and keep nurturing her/his love for the game, while the world around capitalizes on the pain point itself.

On one hand where IPL is thronging the popularity chart, on the other hand the hatred speech by the latest young face of one of the two big parties of our country is also raking moolah for the media. A quick read through the speech reveals that it’s not a battle for campaigning but a ground for belching hatred and wrath which has been developing within the same dynasty for decades. Mud slinging has become order of the day for Indian politics, but such vendetta should definitely be kept in check by the Election Commission with stringent penalty. I wonder if these people with crowd moving potentials ever think of the impact that their speeches and promises have on the young minds. Maybe not!

With IPL and politics hanging heavy on my head I desperately need something refreshing, some thing which would not make me think and turn bitter….and what better than the cool and soothing drizzly sprinkling rain of Bangalore. So while I soak myself in this magic of nature, you keep watching this space for some more fun and some more gyaan :-)

Scramble in a Valley - II

In part One we had left the lady to enjoy the initial warmth of this city, so lets check on her and find out how comfortable the city has made her feel.

Oops, by the way I forgot to introduce her in the previous part (how rude!!…I know) so let's make up for that. She is Natasha (now guys stop drooling over the name).

OK, now let me share the happenings of Natasha's life after we bade her good bye last time. Natasha just loved the place which she had found after days of struggle and spent the entire weekend enhancing its aesthetic value…an artist that she was….

A well placed black colour Bean bag was her favourite possession in the room. By the way did I mention that Natasha got a single room for herself and the room very well reflected her soul and identity after the redo; a space where she could be herself after the arduous hours of jostle with the outside domain.

Ahem Ahem.... don't worry I don't intend to turn this into any kind of a sermon…

After she settled down in her room, Natasha geared up for her first day in the new job. Her mind was thronged with an assortment of emotions…a li'l jittery thinking about her new role…a li'l excited about meeting new people…li'l bewildered thinking about coping with the language…with such thoughts on her mind Natasha slept off.

Her morning was welcomed with a loud bang on the main door of the flat. She tried ignoring it but dear that morning sleep is to people, nobody bothered to get up. So our lady pulled herself out of the bed and prodded towards the living room to open the door. She rubbed her eyes twice, thrice but couldn't find anyone on the door… ”I must be too sleepy” Natasha thought in her mind, but despite her continuous rubbing of eyes she couldn't see anyone outside the door.

"How strange and irritating people could be early morning" Natasha blurted out in irritation and tried pushing the door to close it. While doing so she looked at the floor and saw a hot case kept over a steel utensil right outside.

"Now what the hell is this?" She bent down to check the stuff inside. When she opened it she found Idlis and Sambhar in the utensils and after reeling in confusion for few minutes, it struck her that this could the breakfast for the morning.

"Is this how we get breakfast every morning?" a still skeptical Natasha asked one of her roommate who had also gotten up by then.

"Yeah every morning...and the best part is we don't even know if this is fresh for us or it has been tasted by dogs roaming around" Natasha shuddered at this comment of her roommate so much so that she immediately made up her mind to skip her breakfast…forever!!

Pushing this thought out of her head, Natasha got ready for the office and stepped out of her PG.

First day in the office appeared pleasant to Natasha until lunch time, when she was told that the office does not have a cafeteria for lunch. So like a falling deck of cards her ideate of a classy cafeteria in an IT company of Bangalore came tumbling down….psst psst…poor girl had to bear the trauma of No Cafeteria and No Conveyance in her company on the very first day itself..

No Conveyance…How did she travel to her office then? Well, she so much did not wish to stand at arm pit distance to anyone, that she preferred to enjoy the insanely bumpy rides of auto rather then commuting by BMTC a.k.a., public buses of Namma Bengaluru.

Little did she know that she would be mustering such amusing experiences in her routine travel by auto.

While one day an autowala shared a joke with her in the morning with a concern that after she goes to the office she would be all sucked up in the work, the other day an autowala gave her a long discourse on how important is to stand by the love of your life….of course this entire preaching was based on his autobiography! Not quite far behind was an autowala who took Natasha by surprise when he exhibited his up-to-date stock market knowledge despite his feeble financial health…and to spice-up this concoction was the autowala who said that he was a chef (!!) in a five star hotel in Mumbai and earned around 30k pm… (Whoever said education was important to mint money should be hiding somewhere now). It's a different story that he quit due to his silly mistakes but now was rearing to setup his own catering business. Completely inspiring dude !!

Our lady has come a long way since her inaugural adventure in the city…from initial irritation to getting used to the anecdotes…. Natasha has now learnt to enjoy this city and often feels nostalgic, about every single thing, on days when she is away from this chaotic and harebrained comfort of the people and the place, of soon to be named PG Valley!!

Scramble in a Valley...

Heavy traffic, maddening rush, unpredictable rain, incomprehensible language….phewww!!!...Just a few of the things that irritate a person, who steps in this much hyped city, tendering dreams of a luxurious life. Dreams do get fulfilled in due course of time, but in this mad rat-race our newly turned bangalorean jostles through numerous doses of daily tortures.
Along with playing home for IT giants of the country aka Silicon Valley, Bangalore is also hosting thousands of North Indians and would soon earn the name PG Valley in the near future!

(Interestingly, a person who does not belong to either of the elite States – Karnataka, Kerela, Tamil Nadu and Andhra Pradesh is comfortably branded as North Indian. Either West and East directions are not very appealing to them or they choose to be oblivious towards these directions. This mystery might need Sherlock Holmes' brilliance to get unfurled)

So even before our bangalorean gets to live the much puffed up glamour of the city, she gears up (of course forcefully) for the ordeal which awaits her while she plans to park herself in some cozy place.

To set the ball rolling our lady browses through the net and goes through all the ads for PGs and rented flats. The process is tiring as the ads are non descriptive, weird, funny and some even try to redefine the English language. She just didn't know what sense to make out of ads like "Decent PG for Decent girls"…now come on we didn't know that Bangaloreans are so smitten with the IT fever that they would have the know-how of differentiating between decent and indecent girls in one look itself!
One ad was too generous in giving details like "PG accommodation for all kind of ladies" (????!!!!$$$$$)… Well hello…good morning, we didn't know as yet that ladies are also of different kinds. Some one was definitely donning the hat of Charles Darwin to discover the new class and sub-class for the fairer sex. Completing this trilogy was the ad, which read something like this "2BHK with extremely homely, safe, clean surrounding for ladies who are willing to share their bed" What on earth this person was thinking while posting this ad… and by the way did this person know that this could land him behind the bars for promoting trafficking !!!!..As a friend of mine keeps saying "Kalyug Kalyug" ....psstttt...
Our lady some how jostled thru this journey and found a place of her liking in an area which was well connected to the city. A nice place to stay in this busy city sounds like a great start…. only if it could be…"Well begun is half done" did not hold true in this case though….So what happened next ????

….well, well, well….let us not steal the pleasure of initial warmth of this city from our lady…so while she enjoys her new abode lets take a break and peek somewhere else(he he he...impish thought :D)…stay tuned for more updates of our lady's spiced up life in the next part!!!